Defeating the Spirit of Rebellion in Your Child

•May 9, 2018 • Leave a Comment

I never thought it would happen to our family, I’m sure many Christian parents say that too.  We were all passionately on fire for the Lord, well all, but one.

The verse, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it” (Prov. 22:6 MEV) took on new meaning after my experience.  I learned crucial keys in the process of dealing with a rebellious child how not to push her further away from God, but draw her back to God.

I never doubted my child would come back.  I knew all along the Spirit would get ahold of her and set her on fire to be a world changer.   There is hope for your child too.  There is hope for any child!  The key to deliverance is two-fold, not just on the child, but also on the parents.  The parents need to rely on the Holy Spirit for wisdom and insight.  The child needs to bind their flesh, submit their strong-will and allow the Holy Spirit to convict them.  We cannot change our children or force them to change, but by the grace of God and guidance of the Holy Spirit we can expect change when we follow the Spirit’s leading.

The first and foremost thing we need to do is to pray a simple prayer over our child.  “Holy Spirit, convict them and expose the truth to them.” This pray is simple, but also in its purest form as we are not praying in manipulation, control or self-made agendas of what we want to see changed in them. The Holy Spirit knows best what needs to be prayed for our child and how to reveal their short comings.

Being pastors if was difficult for my husband and I, to learn our daughter wasn’t interested in the pursuit of Jesus the rest of our family desired.  And even though our daughter was never into drugs, smoking, drinking, or sex, her hyper-sensitive extreme teenage attitude and rebellion was a great strain and stress on our family.

The greatest adjustment was learning to keep my mouth shut when I wanted to force my way or control the situation.  Such as, when I discovered she was listening to country music when only Christian music was allowed in our home.  You have to learn to choose your battles.  While my friend would force worship flags into her daughter’s hands to try and encourage her relationship with the Lord, I took a step back and asked the Holy Spirit, “What do you say about this situation and what should my response be?”  I believe we need to rely more on the Holy Spirit than our flesh and natural reaction if we want to win the war on rebellion.  I know for me it has tremendously helped over the years to get to know who the Holy Spirit is and how He can help me.  Charisma Media has a series called Life in the Spirit.  It can help you draw close and learn more about the Holy Spirit too.

I believe the keys listed below are crucial in helping rebellious children come back to the Lord, instead of driving them further away.  It worked for me, and I hope and pray it will work for your child.  Remember, there is always hope with God, just look at Saul converted to Paul.


Five keys in dealing with a rebellious child:

  1. ALLOW THE HOLY SPIRIT TO LEAD – Seek the Holy Spirit and allow Him to lead and guide your conversation and actions with your child, including when to speak, when to stay quiet and what direction to take next.
  2. BACK-OFF – Don’t push your child, force your opinions or attempt to control them. Give them the space they need.  Pushing and forcing them will only lead them further away.
  3. DECLARE – Pray through declaring prayer. Speak out and declare out your prayers.  Bind and restrict the enemy.  Take authority in the spiritual realm and make sure the devil knows you mean business. (I declared over my child’s room four times and then I saw dramatic change.  You can read about it in my book SPEAK OUT by Creation House.)
  4. PRAY OVER THEIR POSSESSIONS! – Anoint their bedroom, vehicle and possessions with anointing oil. Pray over their food while you prepare it and their clothes while you fold the laundry. Pray and speak out loud into the atmosphere of their bedroom or vehicle.  Anoint their clothes, bed, toothbrush, whatever you can get your hands on, and claim and call them back to the Lord.
  5. PROPHESY IT! – Prophesy their destiny into the atmosphere. Speak and declare they are a world changer and will impact nations.  Speak into the spiritual realm that the devil will not have your child, but that they will be set on fire for the Lord.  Speak and declare, and prophesy what you want to see happen, not in a controlling or manipulative way, but according to the word of the Lord.


Never give up hoping that your child will change; keep believing, that’s what we did.  The Lord told me three times upon dropping my daughter off at college, “This is my will for her life.”  She went to a secular college and her faith began to bloom.  She took a stand against partying, sexual activities, abortion and homosexuality.  She made her faith and stances known in the first year.  She came home that summer and worked on her relationship with me, we are now best friends.

Every year she went back to college, God released more things through her life, she started to blog, and even wrote an article for Charisma Magazine online.  She went on mission trips, got involved in a youth group, led Bible studies and by the last year was living in a church home in a leadership position.  And every summer she came home and worked on another part of rebellion, rejection, or relationships.  She needed the Holy Spirit to lead and guide her and convict her and not her parents for a period of time.

My girl who once went to church out of obligation now can’t wait to get inside the church doors of an apostolic prophetic spirit-filled church.  She recently approached me and is begging me to allow her to travel the nations and minister with me.  And upon moving her home recently, after her senior year, she requested a prayer corner to be set up in her room, in which we gladly obliged.

Again, I want to reiterate the key elements; don’t give up hope, give distance, pray and declare, and let them have the space they need.  Allow the Holy Spirit to lead and guide you and them.  I encourage you to learn how to lean and rely on the Holy Spirit through Charisma Media’s Life in the Spirit Series.

Learn more about the power of declaring prayer through Kathy’s book Speak Out by Creation House.

Kathy DeGraw is a prophetic healing and deliverance minister and the founder of DeGraw Ministries.  She is passionate about releasing the love and power of God to empower and activate people.  She is the author of several books including; Speak Out, Warfare Declarations, Who is Speaking? and Powerful Prophetic Proclamations.  You can connect with Kathy on Facebook @ or visit

Kingdom Preparation – Prophetic Word

•April 26, 2018 • Leave a Comment

PROPHETIC WORD – Kingdom Preparation

What are you doing for the Lord? Are you sitting idly by waiting for time to pass or are you actively pursuing the things of the Lord? The Lord is looking for workers, servants for His Kingdom who are going to shake off worldly habits and activities and get busy building His Kingdom. He does not want us to be slothful, but diligently pursuing His purposes. The Lord wants us to rise up and take on His mannerisms, instead of allowing the world to define and transform us. He has called us for Kingdom purposes; divine purposes, and the Lord says, “It is time to rise up My children, rise up and take your rightful place and authority in the Kingdom.” He says, “There is much work to do to attract people to the Kingdom of God. I need my laborers to rise up and get busy, get active. It is no longer time to sit idly by.” He says, “Why do you not pursue my purposes? What is more important than me.” The Father is not only searching and seeking for those who will worship Him in freedom, spirit and truth, but those who will passionately pursue His presence and draw and lead other people into this Kingdom journey. Christianity is a lifestyle, not a passing daily habit, but something we should pursue to represent and present every day of the week. Living our lives for Christ isn’t always easy, but the benefits out-weigh the struggles. The Lord says, “Are you going to passionately pursue Me like you do the cares and enjoyment you have of the things in this world? I have given you a Kingdom that cannot be shaken. Do you understand that? With Me and My Kingdom you cannot and will not be shaken when you put me first. I have loved you with an everlasting love. I enjoy being with you. You move My heart. Now rise up my saints, get busy, because the time draws near.”

Physical Healing is Manifesting in 2018!

•March 1, 2018 • Leave a Comment

What I’m hearing from the Lord for 2018.

There are many things the Lord has been revealing to me about 2018.  Prophetically, it is a year of walking by faith and not by sight.  I am excited for what the Lord is going to release this year.  Specifically, I believe many destinies will pop open and people will see supernatural favor and insights for the ministry they are to launch.

However, what I am most excited about is the revelation the Spirit is giving to, my husband and me.  This year is going to be a year in which the Father releases physical healing to His people.  We will see miracles upon miracles being released into the body of Christ for healing of their bodies.  We will experience a teaching and equipping of the saints like never before in the area of healing.

God’s people must be made whole in order to be effective for the Kingdom of God.  How can we preach and testify healing if we don’t receive it?  We don’t want to ruin our testimony by preaching healing and living in sickness.  God desires us whole.  Therefore, this year DeGraw Ministries will be taking a message of physical healing around the United States!  We will be empowering people in what Jesus says about healing through the Gospels and we will be breaking it down in a way that is easy to understand so you are able to apply it to your personal life.  Healing is yours because of what Jesus did for you!  Will you open your heart to receive it?


Prophetic Refreshing

•February 27, 2018 • Leave a Comment

Yielding to the Spirit will create a prophetic refreshing in this season!

The Spirit has gifts of refreshing for you, yes for you, but you won’t position yourself to be in His presence in order to receive these gifts; being in His presence costs. It costs your time, it costs your sacrifice and it costs your flesh. It costs giving up control over what you want for what He longs to give you. Make no mistake He wants you in His presence. He wants to love on you. He desires to give you more. You want to be refreshed, but you won’t settle down enough to receive the refreshing He has for you. He has a place of rest that you can enter now, if you will be willing and obedient to do it. It doesn’t matter what others think or if they don’t understand. I have called you to this time. A time of gaining My purpose for your life, a time of vast companionship and rest. Rest in Me alone, not your fellow companions, but Me.


Waging the Prophetic War

•February 26, 2018 • Leave a Comment

Prophetic declarations will bring forth both results and warfare.  When you know how to declare, you can decree against the warfare that will attempt to attack you.

God the Father declared over Jesus his Son, which led to warfare, but Jesus knew how to combat the warfare with His words.  We too must speak out to combat the spirit realm which attempts to attack us.

God declared out loud a prophetic declaration over His son.

“Coming up out of the water, He immediately saw the heavens opened and the Spirit descending on Him like a dove. And a voice came from heaven, saying, ‘You are My beloved Son in whom I am well pleased.’ The Spirit immediately drove Him into the wilderness. And He was there in the wilderness for forty days, tempted by Satan, and was with the wild beasts. And the angels ministered to Him.” – Mark 1:10-13

The first thing that happened after the prophetic proclamation is that the Spirit drove Jesus into the wilderness.  The declaration went forth, and then, the spiritual battle began.  This isn’t much different from what we experience in our lives today.  You are given a prophetic word, and once that word is spoken out into the atmosphere the devil and his demons attempt to steal, kill and destroy that destiny (John 10:10).  Just as Satan tempted Jesus in the wilderness, he is going to try and send spiritual warfare your way to prevent your words from manifesting.

It is during that time you have to put on your game face, as my friend Greg would say, and get to war and fight the battle with the words of your mouth through prayer.  You need to have an arsenal of Scripture stored up in you, like Jesus did, to be able to combat the devil and his plans against you.

Our prophetic words have prophetic destinies and produce much fruit when we experience the manifestation of these words.  Learning how to warfare and pray efficiently against these attacks could produce more prophetic words coming to pass.  The battle begins when the prophetic declaration is spoken out.  Vigilance in our prayer and study time will better equip us to see the manifestation of our words and combat the attacks of the enemy.

The battle begins when the declaration has been spoken.

Satan tempted Jesus.  He tested and tried Him, and he tests and tries us.  Jesus stood His ground and declared out the written word of God.  Each time the devil came, Jesus would quote Scripture to combat the spiritual warfare and speak and declare the truth.  Jesus spoke Scripture with power and authority.  We too, need to stand on the word of God and declare out Scriptures, but we can only declare out what we know.  You can’t put out what you haven’t taken in.  Reading the Bible, studying and memorizing Scripture is an important part of our daily spiritual walk.

Co-labor with the Holy Spirit to bring your prophetic words to pass (you can learn more about the Holy Spirit in Charisma’s Life in the Spirit series.)  He can guide you in your prayer time and assist you, (Rom. 8:26).

The prophetic declaration was spoken over Jesus, and He was tested and tried in the wilderness and then His ministry launched!  The first thing Jesus did when He came out of that experience was to cast out demons!

“In their synagogue there was a man with an unclean spirit. And he cried out, “Leave us alone! What do You have to do with us, Jesus of Nazareth? Have You come to destroy us? I know who You are, the Holy One of God.” Jesus rebuked him, saying, “Be silent and come out of him!” When the unclean spirit had convulsed him and cried out with a loud voice, it came out of him.” – Mark 1:23-26

The testing and declaration led Him into His destiny!  So often we want the destiny without the ugly stuff that comes before our release.  Embrace the process!  Are you waiting to see your prophetic words come to manifestation in the natural?  Remember, through prayer and Bible study the very words that God has declared over you can come to pass.  Rise up and fight the enemy with the word of God and with your voice through prophetic prayer.

Kathy DeGraw is the founder of DeGraw Ministries a prophetic deliverance ministry releasing the love and power of God.  She travels hosting conferences, teaching schools, and evangelistic love tours.   Kathy enjoys writing and is the author of several books that educate, empower and equip people, including Warfare Declarations, Who is Speaking, Speak Out and Identity Invasion.  Connect with Kathy at




Releasing Love Costs Obedience

•October 13, 2017 • Leave a Comment

I always pray where to go on ministry trips.  Years ago the Holy Spirit had me start taking prophetic love tours.  During these tours, the Spirit of the Lord will instruct me where to go, when to turn, and which restaurants and hotels to stop at.  Often I have a general direction when I start as to where I will go and sometimes we get on the road and simply drive for 3-11 days at a time.

I have taken 11 prophetic love tours where we go and love on the homeless, prophesy on the streets and go to love on God’s servants.  I live in Michigan, and we have traveled as far west as Las Vegas and south to Louisiana.  We have done an East Coast tour and started out our first love tour in Wisconsin.  We have traveled far and wide to make the love of Jesus known.

Three years ago my ministry was forever changed as I traveled three short hours away and went to love on well known Christian businessmen and ministers.  As I went to this meeting to simply be love and release the prophetic over their individual lives, I came away feeling more love than I even poured out.  These men oozed out such a love of the Father that I went on a three-day solitude retreat with the Lord afterward in which I birthed my ministry of love.

Everything changed from that day forward.   I had already known the intimate love of the Father, but now I was going to make it a mission that everyone who came in contact with my ministry felt His abundant love.  I changed my ministry mission from healing and deliverance to releasing the love and power of God.  When we release the love and power of God, healing and deliverance will occur, so now I can release both missions into people’s lives.

I have just arrived back from my 11th love tour.  My assignment from the Holy Spirit was to go down and love on an Apostle in Maryland.  He wasn’t having any problems or feeling discouraged.  In the natural, nothing was going on that He needed an uplifting experience.  The Father simply wanted this man to be loved upon.  Everyone needs love.  Everyone needs to experience the vastness of God’s love.

Once again, like in my meeting above, God blew me away.  As I went there to be love, I felt like I got more love back.  Sometimes my saying is, “they out loved me.”  What I am trying to express is that even though I poured out every ounce of love I had, I felt so much more love back.  Seven days later I am still basking in His weighty presence and great love.

Obedience costs us something.  The obedience we had to offer God was our time, finances and family.  We had to give up our agenda for His instructions.  I love to preach.  The pulpit is where I come alive!  I love sharing the Gospel and releasing prophetically whatever the Spirit has for each meeting.  I love declaring and seeing the bondages break off of people from the platform.  However, God told me, this tour was about being love and that I could do more for His Kingdom by going here and just being love than I could if I was invited to speak at this event.  I can’t wait to get to heaven and see the Kingdom impact one simple act of being love and obedience brought forth.

Why don’t you take some time to pray and seek the Holy Spirit for your next instruction, whether big or small and be obedient to take that action to advance the Kingdom!

Goodness of God

•October 9, 2017 • Leave a Comment

The goodness of His love overwhelms me. It engulfs me. The weightiness of His presence consumes me. There is such peace in the atmosphere it is indescribable. The magnificence of His beauty is hard to take in. All alone in His presence is where I want to be. He is my treasure, my love, my priority. He alone is everything to me.

The goodness of God saturates the earth but seldom do we take time to feel it and experience it. We are caught up in life’s busyness.

The fragrance of His presence, I can smell the scent of His beauty! It is what I long for and that for which I thirst. He is so wonderful when we come into that place of rest. God longs for us to be with Him. Won’t you linger in His presence?

Our Father is an all-consuming fire. He can consume us with His fragrance, love, and fire when we allow ourselves to be removed from the world and put our attentions and affections on Him. He will give us so much more than we ask or fathom. God longs to be with you!

I am saturated with His love, and it feels good, the weightiness of His presence consumes me, it keeps coming. He desires us to walk in that weightiness so that people are healed, delivered and miracles are released by His glory. Why can’t we be like Peter who when His shadow feel on people they were miraculously released of their affliction? Why can’t we carry that same glory? We can!
Entering into the presence of God and allowing Him to linger upon us and not being in a hurry to get through our day will lead us into divine encounters. I want to go where He goes. I don’t want one moment to not have a prophetic or Kingdom aspect about it. Every appointment should be a prophetic appointment, but we have to be intentional. Intentional to rest and go into that secret place where He can lavish His great love upon you.

Can you give up your agenda for His? Can you linger in His lavish love? Can you get so full of Him that the scent of His fragrance oozes from your pours? Love on Him so that He can love on you, and in return, you have lots of His love to ooze on others.

Kathy DeGraw is the founder of DeGraw Ministries –